She walked into the bathroom and closed the door as easily as she could.
Without turning on the lights she dragged herself to the tub.
The water seemed to sprint out of the shower head roaring so loud it deafened her.
She went to stand in front of the mirror, her head down in shame.
Afraid to turn on the lights, afraid to see what the mirror would reveal.
Reserved tears stung her eyes and dried blood encased her face.
Her body ached from the pads of her feet to the tips of her hair.
And with fear in her heart, she reached for the light switch and forced herself to turn on the lights.
At first glance the little strength she had left gave out and her tears poured from her eyes.
Her brown skin had lost its color and gained so many others.
Her chest rose and fell rapidly as she examined herself.
Black and blue never suited me she said to herself trying to calm her nerves.
But for once her humor seemed to fail her.
Questions flooded her mind.
“What will I wear to work tomorrow? How will I wear my hair? What did I do?”
Nothing made sense to her.
Cuts and bruises tainted her once flawless skin.
Blood stains on her t-shirt seemed to burn her and she shed herself of the clothes that trapped her.
She wanted to run, but to where?
For he was out there, waiting. Apologizing for his behavior. His breakdown that caused him to beat her.
Tired of looking at her beaten and bruised body she cut the lights off.
And with the darkness came the pain. Again.
She could feel it, see it, smell it. The fight that came out of nowhere.
Her silent tears became loud sobs. Drowning out his, I’m sorry’s and forgive me’s.
She sank into the tub wincing at the sting of the hot water against her destroyed body.
Tuning out his pleas.
When will he stop?
The water seemed to soothe her fears and ignited her anger.
SHUT UP! She yelled at him from the tub.
Immediately regretting it. Scared, but it worked.
He stopped. And she cried.
She cried about her bad decisions, her aching, her trials and tribulations.
Everything that had once plagued her.
She sat in the tub until the water went from steaming to cold.
She returned to the mirror and once again cut on the lights.
Disappointed that the water washed away only her blood and not the bruises.
She cried, and cried until her head began to ache.
Until the cool wetness from the pillow forced her to open her eyes.
“Not again,” she whispered. “Will these nightmares ever end?”
My reflection, my nightmare, my punishment.
Ladies, don’t ever allow someone to make you feel less than what you are worth. Nothing you do is worth any man putting his hands on you. Don’t justify it, don’t make excuses, and please don’t stay.
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