May 14th, 2012 
Up4Dsn 
“People who fight fire with fire end up with only the ashes of their own integrity.”
~Michael Josephson
Has your integrity been tested?
It’s funny how people can do something wrong to you, or someone close to you, and as a way of protecting ourselves, or someone close, we tend to want to seek revenge. But we know if we sink to their level we will lose a piece of ourselves in the process. It will cause people to look at us with the side eye, thinking “I thought he/she was better than that.”
Wow! Last weekend I was a tested. I could’ve fought fire with fire, but that would’ve compromised everything that I am. And I refuse to let that happen. I was so shocked by this person’s actions that I wanted some get back, but I knew that route was not the road I wanted to take. Sometimes you have to be the bigger person and know that some people are just selfish and/or a**holes.
Share you thoughts.
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My mother tests my integrity probably more than anyone else. She has a way of saying things just to try to test me and then gets defensive if/when I respond, but since I refuse to give in to the drama, I'm left with my peace of ming and ingrety because I refuse to be drawn into the rabbit hole. I'm bigger and better than I used to be when dealing with her, which speaks volumes to my character and self-awareness. There's a lot to be said for that!
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That's a blessing. I'm curious, how long did it take you to get to the point where you are now?
It took a while because I would always fall back to the proverbial saying, "honour your parents". While I'd never actually apologize because I would stand firm on my defending myself, which mother naturally would throw back in my face even though she never apologized for her attacking me or initiating the drama in the first place. One day, I was simply sick of it all and made a concscious decision to no longer let her control me emotionally and compromise something that means a lot to me. My integrity is in ALL aspects of my life. Emotional integrity is very important in my relationships and if my voice is forced to be squashed, then my integrity is compromised, which is not cool. I stand firm on saying what I need to say. It's sometimes not voiced until all things are carefully considered, but when I did finally say what I need to say, it's said from the heart.
My recent post Happy Mother’s Day
I know that's right!
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I'm so glad you were able to reach that point. It's definitely a lot more healthy and better on you…emotionally and physically. Thank you for answering my question and sharing your experience with us Jewel.
It's hard when a family memeber does that. Especially a mother, because you have to be mindful or what you say and how you say it. But you have to get your point across.
This post was inspired by a family memeber of mines. At any rate I wanna to thank you for sharing and commenting!
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Everyday life is a test. Pride often leads us to be vindictive or keep our heads held up high(turning the other cheek). It's so hard to be the bigger person because at times a person can often feel, if I let them have this once then they will forever try me.f aith comes by hearing and not by sight. God allowed me to be tested in January on my job. I was baffled since I had been a friend to this person but God will always show us who are friends really are..She cost loyalty to seek a higher position that no one in our agency wanted. Why do people often feel threaten by others instead of believing in their own self worth. My heart won't allow me to tear others down to make my self look good..If my superior can't see the real me, then I rather not have any higher position at all. I guess she felt it was necessary to make the light shine on her regardless if it was a dim false light. I took the high road remembering the words in the greatest book ever written. Vengeance is mine..We weep, what we sow..I knew when I spoke those words I had to let God have that battle..God handle to situation now everyone sees her for what she always was….I wish her the best
Oh yeah! You already know God has you. He is going to take care of you and take you to places you'd never imagine. People will hurt us, but God will always be there to heal us. Thank you so much for sharing your experience and sharing some much needed insight. I truly appreciate it Spice!
Josephson had the right idea and this is a good reminder via Sunny. Thanks for sharing.
If I really sit and think about my experiences where Integrity was comprised I can wholeheartedly relate to the quote. With little or no emphasis shown, I discern the differences between losing and maintaining such conviction, and it definitely makes a world of a difference.
Probably one reason why I'm more inclined to simply walk away opposed to losing my integrity, any further.
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I'm with you Don. It can be difficult, but walking away is usually the best option.
I second that… it is hard but its a must!
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Good post! I always maintain my integrity. One's integrity reflects his or her character. When you strive to be an example for others, they need to see you as a person with high integrity.
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Couldn't agree more. Thanks for checking this out!!
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